Fairly Happy

I had my birthday dinner yesterday at Kafe Pisa Menteng. I had fun but half of the guest I've invited couldn't make it. It sucked but I believe that people who came were the ones who really cared for me. Anyway, went to the Salon before the party and was having a bad mood. I've always hated Salons, not a big fan of looking beautiful. Don't care about hair and make-up. I think I look best with just powders and neutral colors. Anyway, I hate salons. People may think I'm beautiful but I don't feel like it. Fuck.

Had pastas and a very chocolate-ty dessert, pictures, all that jazz.

bag and top from Ella.

Wallet from Lerina.

Two pairs of shoes from Andrea.

Diary of a Wimpy Kid *indonesia version* with a necklace and bangle from Jessie and Arti.

Mother of Pearl from Amelia, Loren and Patricia.

Notebook from Elish.

I don't feel like 17. It feels like any other age. When I was younger, 17 means a lot. But now, when I'm 17, I'm the same. Haven't make the big changes

Like now,

I'm having a commitment issue. Not in a relationship (I consider myself unlucky in love), but with work. I start asking: What's the point if you don't love it? People are asking so much of you, do you get anything in return? Just a satisfaction, full stop. I miss being a 'normal' student whose sole job is to learn and socialize. Me? I'm like in a different stratosphere. Normal students don't care about anything but study and have fun.

the question is do I really want to be a normal, ordinary student?

Yes and No.

PS: I have no joy working. Fak. I've been working non-stop. Is this life?

ta-ta,

Hana.